Alone not lonely



<a href="http://s1192.photobucket.com/albums/aa336/billlee2323/Artistic%20Touch/?action=view&amp;current=5605908840_7ff35cf9f0_o.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i1192.photobucket.com/albums/aa336/billlee2323/Artistic%20Touch/5605908840_7ff35cf9f0_o.jpg" border="0" alt="what happens when your camera sucks..."></a>

Time Flies

Time Flies, a photo by billlee2330 (Casey M.) on Flickr.

I was only 27 in this photo.

Praying Mantis- edit

Praying Mantis- edit, a photo by billlee2330 (Casey M.) on Flickr.

What is it with my brain that makes me so melancholy!?

In these days, I believe Jesus himself would say to those who sit down in a state of melancholy, "It is not here, get up and go forth. Why do you seek the living among the dead."

I have lived with psychoactive drugs in my brain for as long as I can remember.



Love your neighbor as yourself.





Their weapon is guilt. I am now 32 years old. I can't go on like this much longer. I have to go out to the yard to murder a skunk- and if I fail, he will murder me. Some things never change.

"In the coffin of ice, I sleep naked

In the tunnel of fire, I drink."

- F. X. Leach

hypergraphic ramblings: Comp problems

hypergraphic ramblings: Comp problems

Fungus on the stump

Fungus on the stump, a photo by billlee2330 (Casey M.) on Flickr.

If I were very small I could live on this stump.

Well, hello again folks. Here I am after 0 hrs of sleep in over 50 hours. My body aches all over and I'm a little dehydrated. I have been manic for the last two days or so...



I feel totally crappy. Panic and pain are wearing me down.I'm having headaches and weird unfounded fears. I have this intense fear that when I give a urinalysis at my methadone clinic, I will test dirty for some reason or another. Like what if some of my meds combine and react with eachother to cause me to fail the piss test...or what if someone wants to sabatage me and cause me to lose all of my take-home doses, so they put meth in my coffee, or heroin in my tea. Weird unfounded thoughts, which really, in life as long as I'm not doing drugs (and I'm not), there is nothing I could even do to prevent these things from transpiring. I KNOW my thoughts are weird...at least I know that I'm being weird. But I cannot help these thoughts much of the time.

Part of what allows me to get irrational thoughts is my intense loneliness.

Hello out there!!!!



How's things going? Things are starting to get foggy again in my dome. I hope to cut the levels of distortion. Modulate the volume. Not lash out at others or give people lethal thrashings of the most barbaric form.

It's time to run out of myself.

Hello there people!!!!

Well, I hope all my loved ones are doing well and are healthy. I do love you all!!!

I wish I were a rock

If I were a rock

I would be a strong rock

I would be an unbreakable rock

I would be a rock of God.

If anyone needs a good freelance photographer, let me know.

Another sleepless night. My whole body hurts.

Some older photos that I've been editing...

I get so very lonely at times. Most of the time. 

And now ppl are condemning me.